Reasons & Seasons...

Here I am again young world, ready to burden your ears with my nonsensical ramblings...well let's get to it then. Inspirations comes in many fashions and not all are fit to size. Clarity inspired by minor and/or major discomfort is often missed as some people choose to identify with the hurt and negativity as opposed to the silver lining. I made a committment to myself a while back to intend to remain positive in any and every situation. Getting all bugged out solves absolutely nothing. Keeping a level head however, shows you plenty of possible outcomes. I'm sure you already knew there was a story to be intertwined into all of this.

Now lend me your attention further...I'm not one for getting too explicitly personal via the web so I will be keeping it brief with no personal indentification of characters. a couple of years ago I was smitten by a miraculous man in my opinion. We started to get acquainted and recognized quite a few things that we adored about one another. We had our visions of the ideal relationship that would appear to most as unconventional and a bit whimsical, but that was cool, cause we live outside the norm anyhow. Well, over time major and minor circumstances occured and revealed the lack of foundation in our newly formed companionship. We both acknowledged the grievances to a degree and decided to act accordingly. At the same time, I being some sort of a typical woman, shared some details of the situation with one of my dearest. As the situation evolved and new discoveries were made, dearest decided to express her personal concerns to my Mr. Upon receiving the alert to the recent events, I already knew that the situation would neither get better nor dissolve so I had to put my game face on. Reflecting on the behaviors of both of the participants I was certain that every move I made would be critical in derailing a troublesome train.

Consequently, the Mr. and I conversed and all inquires were answered and thus laid to rest. However, I had this nagging feeling that I was being punished for another persons deeds. This thought needed to be immediately dispelled, for once negativity is released it tends to run rampant. No matter how my dearest felt or how I may have felt about Mr.'s collective words and actions, his words and actions are not mine to focus on. My time was best served deciphering how my own words and behaviors affected the bottom line of a near bankrupt acquaintanceship. I value him highly as a person still...we are all works in progress and are not free from making misstakes ourselves. In my reflection I uncovered quite a few instances where I should have played my role a bit differently. My only beneficial option from this moment forward is to remember how my previous deeds did not serve me well, and attempt to not repeat them.

Unfortunately, there are so many people dying over lost love because they left such dismantled foundations that repair seems damn near impossible. I'm sure that a good deal of these situations were salvageable in hindsight. Once we've given ourselves enough time to reflect on all of the vehemently spat curses and destructive deeds committed, we see clearly that the level of anger toward the situation was unwarranted. Most people's clarity comes a little too late which leaves them feeling a bit hopeless. Meanwhile, I knew from the moment Mr. and I connected that we were in each others lives to teach the other something. I collected quite a bit of knowledge from this man's beautiful mind and for this I am sincerely grateful. It has been my intention, through this relationship, to change the way I decide to deal with matters of the heart. So instead of holding a grudge for feeling betrayed, I chose to forgive him immediately and realize that whatever reason he had for not being true to our relationship is his reason, not mine.

Fast forward a year, and I find myself in a similar situation, except this time, the shoe is on the other foot. Here I am faced with the fact that another being feels as though I am the cause of all her pain and suffereing. I will be the first to admit that I may not have gone about the dissolution of our relationship the right way. Instead of being totally and completely forthcoming about how I was feeling, I chose to make my exit stage left with minimal explanation. I didn't feel like she needed more of an explanation than I had already provided, and this was very selfish of me. Needless to say, that didn't go so well. Once the shit really hit the fan I was called to the carpet and had to take responsibility for my actions in which I did. However, this was not good enough for Mrs.; instead of her accepting my apology and making amends, she chose to dwell in the foolishness of our past behavior. For a slight moment, I actually fed into the propaganda and began to feel terrible about how I had caused her so much pain. In the midst of feeling melancholy over being a "terrible friend" I had a revelation, a person can only do to you what you allow them to do. With that being said, I understood that what she claimed I did, was only what she allowed me to do, and she must take responsibility for that. This is when I had to blatantly explain to her why I was not willing to continue to allow her to make me the cause of her dismay. I apologized for my behavior and asked for her forgiveness and that my darlings, is all I could ever do to remedy the turmoil between us. Now I can say, as time has passed, that we'vre resolved our differences and everything is everything. Although we are not able to have a close relationship like we once had, we can definitely go on knowing that we have put the past behind us. In my evolution as a human becoming, I can also express the fact that I am happy and appreciative of the lessons I've learned through both of these relationships. I needed to see these different sides of myself in order to understand that I can be both the victim and the perpetrator if I so choose; and being in either one of these positions is extremely uncomfortable at best. So my advice to all is to simply live in gratitude and forgiveness cause absolutely EVERYTHING happens for a reason...

Forever,

Shu Larrieux

Baby It's Cold Outside...

The cold weather is upon us and we as carnal beings are searching for the next warm body to snuggle up with if we don't already have one. We weigh the pros and cons of romantic prospects and decide upon what feels like the best fit for the moment. However, we all know how hasty decisions or simply decisions nonetheless come with a set of consequences. We get with someone and it's all blissful in the beginning, but after a while reality tends to set in, the hair comes down, and it all falls apart. Most people don't care to admit that they play any part in the deterioration of romance, so they expose the faults of others and settle for feeling like everyone else out here is on something else, never stopping to glance in the mirror. Which leads me to our newest discussion...the stereotypes typical behaviors assigned to the sexes when it come to amorous relations.

I, Ms. Shu-Shu, recently answered some questions posted by a male friend of mine interested in picking the brains of [single] women. His questions were honest, but the type that were most likely not gonna receive honest answers from women, if they chose to comment at all. A few of us did, and as we speak, it's turning into an interesting conversation. (I'm sure you already know who had the nerve to stir the pot ;) Meanwhile, I discussed the note with Ms, Chi Chi and she lead me to a similar blog that canvassed the matter of white women versus black women in how they play the feminine role in a chivalrous affair. The man in question made the choice to seek out a white woman as a potential mate for her seemingly submissive attributes. Intrigued, Chi-Chi counters...

Oh me oh my...where do I begin?!? Let me start off by saying this is being turned into a race issue when really that's not the matter at hand. It is a matter of proper breeding and self respect on both the male and female in the relationship. To address the statement that 99% of black women can't play the background of a relationship...there may be some truth to that statement but let's examine why. So many women are forced into roles that cause them to wear the pants AND the dress so to speak. Whether it be the lack of a Male's presence or the fact that there are so many "boys" that don't know how to be MEN! Unfortunately this is directed toward but is not limited to black males.

So many of our men are neglecting to step up and take their place in society that it is throwing the entire socioeconomic dynamic out of wack. He can say that he wants a "white girl" but really is that what he wants?!? Or is it that he would prefer to have someone that is submissive and hangs on his every word? Don't get me wrong, I feel that a woman should be submissive to a man (in the biblical sense of course and we won't even get started on what that means, but it's hardly do what I say do!), but that man needs to be a man that she can submit to. Men and women of all races, but especially blacks, have lost their way. We have little to no self respect anymore.

Women have every right to raise the bar and have high standards for their men, but men can do the same of women. You won't respect a woman if she's out in the streets acting like a little gutter rat. Just the same as we won't respect a man that has no determination, no ambition, and is always just waiting around for something to happen but in the meantime trying to live off his woman, yet he wants to wear the pants. What type of sense does that really make? There is nothing wrong with learning and growing together and leaning on one another...that is what a relationship is about. However, if you and the mate that you choose aren't on the same page it will never work.

The way that we are being brought up is affecting our male/female relations as well. Males are no longer in the home and mothers are getting younger and younger. Babies are having babies who have no home training themselves, so how in the hell can they teach the next generation?!? Some people had the nerve to get mad when the President told these men to pull their pants up and be a father to their children. If things were going according to plan, these statements and conversations wouldn't be necessary. It all boils down to knowing your role and playing it. So to sum it up...you don't need a "suburban" chick, you just need a woman that has class and self respect, that can hold her own, understand her role and play it well.

But before we get into what the other individual needs to do, we must examine our behavior and the vibes we emit into the atmosphere, cause believe it or not, like begets like. If a man wants a real woman minus the hassle, then he has to be a real man minus the bullshit and vice versa. How can we seek characteristics in another that we do not possess ourselves? Just a lil' something to think about...

As Ever,

The Sisters Larrieux

Expectations...a dangerous game...

Well Loves,

Leave it up to me to pour a lil adulteration in the pot of conventionality. I've come to believe that this may actually be my life's mission; to challenge everything we know to be "right & true". Therefore, I must address this whole ideal of expectations concerning the relationships we dedicate our time to. The dictionary defines the word expectation as "the act or state of looking forward or anticipating". Now, from the sound of things this does not seem like a really dangerous feat, but when emotions are attached, the magnitude of the meaning transforms.

We all know how tricky most romantic relationships are and can be. If a person, like myself for instance, thinks that it could actually be simple, I'm regarded as whimsical, residing in my own fantasy world. This is because there is a widely renowned belief that life in general is difficult. We do not understand that only our thinking it makes it so, and the major reason why we have these thoughts is based on our expectations of others regarding our own livelihoods.

Life is full of simple truths. Most of these truths we occlude ourselves from because they do not fit into our ideals of the way the world is designed to work. I find it convivial how the majority of our principles are in direct opposition to one another and we choose not to give it a second thought. We can tell some one a "little white lie" but no one can lie to us or its an act of treason punishable by death. What a mess.

We also have the nerve to be demanding of others, angry and disappointed when they do not rise to the occasion and hold grudges for insane lengths of time while searching for ways to justify this behavior. There is no justification. Don't get me wrong, I do wish that all of us would be men and women of our word, but the truth is, not everyone cares enough to do so. I've spent so much time feeling irascible, disserviced, and just plain irritated by what I perceived as other peoples lack of consideration for me, that something had to give. I was existing in a state of misery. I remember complaining to my BFF of how upset I was at another one of my friends who was not being the type of friend I expected her to be. My girl imparted a bit of wisdom upon me, which changed my perspective from that day forward. She simply said "Toccara, you can not expect ______ to be the kind of friend to you, that you are to her. People are who they are, and friendship means different things to different people. "

Relationships in general mean different things to different people. In most cases people spend so much time apologizing for the decisions they make, cause another individual feels they have been wronged by said decision in some way. I'm gonna be real with ya'll. People who are offended by the deeds of others are looking to be offended. Alot of the time the person who has committed an offense did so unintentionally. We need to be realistic and stop assuming and expecting other people to know and understand our every desire and thus act accordingly. We are here to compliment one another, not complete each other. The moment we stop searching to find in others, the things we already possess, the expectations will disappear. We will recognize and accept the fact that we are all works in progress living only as we know how.

In every encounter there is a lesson to be remembered. I say remember, cause we already know everything there is to know, as we are individuations of the divine, we just choose to forget. This is apparent in the way we make excuses for our behavior, we always know better, and that's the bottom line. It's time for us to get over ourselves, out of our feelings and let all of the preconceived notions of foolishness go. Don't get mad at your man cause he didn't get your subliminal message regarding your need for him to act like he's enthusiastic about your ideas even if he isn't. Stop expecting your woman to look and behave like the next female cause your dude is bragging about how cut she is. This type of maniacal behavior is damaging to the collective consciousness and stunting our individual growth. Let's start accepting one another as we are, and truly loving in the only way true love is expressed...unconditionally.

"Love is never having to say 'I'm sorry'..."

As Always,

Ms. Shu Shu

Profound Responsibility

Beautiful People,

In light of our recent state of affairs as humans becoming, I'd like to talk to you all about something. I can already foresee some people getting defensive about the topic so please know that you shouldn't take my life's perspective personal, but if you do, I LOVE U, but I shall not apologize. Anywho, we're getting ready to talk about what I like to call, profound responsibility; meaning, we are all in one way or another responsible for one another. whether it be taking care of our parental obligations or treating others as we desire to be treated, it is true, we are our brothers and sisters keepers.

Being the second oldest of 6 siblings, I grew tired of being the caretaker early. While the rest of my friends enjoyed being regular kids, I was cooking, cleaning, combing hair, running bathwater and helping w/homework. I even learned how to potty train. So it was no surprise to anyone that my perspective on family life did not involve me being a mother. However, after a bit of reflection and some serious self introspection I've decided to reconsider the possibility. I now understand my role in my family unit. It was my profound responsibility to make sure that my sisters were cared for, and that was the bottom line. I can calmly rest in the fact that today they are all wonderful young women who have not been beaten down by life's perils cause I did the best I could do. I recognize now that it is my profound responsibility to always be the best person I can be in any situation in order to contribute to the evolution of others in a positive manner.

Although, I'm a borderline anarchist, I decided that the magnitude of this years election outweighed my personal convictions so I casted my vote. With that being said, I am super excited for President Barack Obama, however, it has nothing to do with the fact that he is black. He is simply an amazing spirit. He has transcended the race issue and most people don't even realize it. His accomplishments are exceptional, the fact that he attended and graduated from Harvard Law is impressive enough. However, the content of his character is being overshadowed by the color of his skin and its rather sad. He acknowledged and accepted his profound responsibility of being a leader, not a BLACK leader, but a leader that just so happens to be black. Honestly, us AA's complain so much about racism and stereotypes, and have the faintest idea that we actually perpetuate them in our everyday existence. I'm not taking anything away from having pride in our culture, but the moment we attach race to an individual's accomplishment, we are setting ourselves back by believing that race is THE important factor.

Something I also find a little funny is our lack of community as a culture. It is true, we have been assimilated and forced to create a culture out of the limited amount of information we were given however, we've gotten comfortable with our minority status and needing "permission" to do things. the culture has adopted the "poor me" syndrome and it's exactly what our ancestors fought so desperately to dispel. So, the moment someone decides to step up and take charge of their life, living without the ideals of racial and economic constraints they are often ostracized and considered an arrogant sell out. How is this being supportive? There is a serious issue with people not being able to sincerely celebrate the achievements of others without feeling envious and jealous, even if it remains hidden. We have actually allowed hating to become popular and claim to welcome it. This had to be one of the most ridiculous idea I've almost ever heard. Wanting to be popular and/or famous just to see how many haters we can acquire, idoicracy. These actions spawn the notion of individuals playing their cards close to their chests, cause aswe as a whole appear a bit untrustworthy. Now, I'm gonna introduce a portion of a conversation I recently had with a dear friend of mine on this exact thing, he states; "have you noticed how black people always want to be exclusive when they come across something good (where you get them Jay's? I'm not telling you or I won't be the only person with em) the truth is no idea is original, nothing is exclusive. the way white kids go to Harvard and get good jobs is because they share the exclusive secrets and put their people on! same with foreigners..."

Truthfully, as he and I discussed, the problems we currently face are a direct reflection on the views held by our generation. We've taken materialism, buffoonery and misogyny to the next level. Instead of most of our parents instilling fundamental values in us, they gave us whatever we asked for or demanded, and made excuses when we became complacent with having things handed to us. I've seen the beautiful music of so many souls die within them because they're simply caught up in the hype and are afraid to step outside the box. Yes Barack Obama has made a dream become reality, but the up-lifting of our people is not his burden to bear. We helped him reach his destiny, but it is up to us to take responsibility for ourselves and each other and become the change we wish to see in the world, or else his accomplishment is just another thing to be added to the history books.

So, turn off the TV, put down the Wii stick, stop forwarding ridiculous text messages, and other thing that could possibly be decelerating your evolutionary pace and get connected to the universal power that drives us to be GREAT. Spend quality time with those you love and do something nice for those you may not know. When we start living in a state of gratitude, the sun will shine upon our heads everyday.

Word from the wise:
When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change. -Deepak Chopra

As Always,

Ms. Shu Shu

My Girl Got A Girlfriend

Greetings Fam,

Sorry, but I have to jump right into this one...It's absolutely hilarious to me how anyone living in America today can believe that they're character is not affected by media of any medium. We live in a capitalistic society that thrives on peoples insecurities, curiosity and most of all...arrogance. The era of the "pseudo baller" is in full effect as mindless souls wait for the next video, web cast or CD to emerge and give them their next move. With that said, I'd like to discuss an ever growing epidemic, we'll call it, "my girl got a girl friend". Now I know female sexuality has been known to cause wars and the like, let's be honest, for the most part it's undeniable. However, I happen to believe it is vastly misunderstood by the opposite sex, it shows in their multiple attempts to exploit it. We're very liberal now, so a woman being sexually attracted to another woman is not that big of a deal at this point. You see it all day on TV and hear about all night on the radio. It's the allure of the menage a troi that causes some men to convince themselves they need it in their lives. At the moment the the idea is conceived, it's perceived from a singular perspective, sexual gratification for self. Most selfish acts come with some sort of consequence, this one is no different. I'll give you an example, a man, we'll call him John, suggests to his wife Jane they invite another woman into their bed. Jane is not initially convinced, but after a few years of relentless persuading she decides to give her husband what he wants. Jane sets out to find the right woman and stumbles upon Mary, a coworker. Mary entertains the couples request, but after being in the moment for a short time, she changes her mind, gets up and leaves the couple high and dry. Of course John is pissed, cause his fantasy is still merely a fantasy. However, Jane who was only moderately interested in the beginning, has a heightened curiosity involving other women now. So, she decides to venture out to find her own girl on girl experience, and runs into Lisa. Lisa unlike Mary, is comfortable with her sexuality and is ready to give Jane exactly what she's been waiting for. After Jane and Lisa become acquainted, Lisa is introduced to John in a roundabout way. John is immediately attracted to Lisa, has an idea that she and his wife are a bit more than just friends, and suggests that Jane ask Lisa to join them in bed this time. Jane is reluctant, so John decides to take matter into his own hands and asks Lisa himself. Surprisingly, Lisa obliges, but things don't necessarily go as planned. Lisa is not as attracted to John as he is her and she is Jane, hence Jane and Lisa have a wonderful time pleasing one another, and John is left as a sideline spectator. After all is said and done, John is furious, and tells Jane that he never wants to do that again. But where does that leave Jane and her new found sexual identity? Now, there are multiple things wrong with this scenario. First, Johns initial thought was not thoroughly contemplated. Second, he employed Jane to find the other woman, giving her a leg up on him. Third, his fantasy in no way coincided with his reality and he was crushed. He was ill prepared to witness his wife moaning for another woman louder than she had for him in years. Can we say...deflated ego?! Sorry fellas, but the majority of you actually have the nerve to underestimate women in all they do. You feel that your manly physique gives you an automatically elevated status but you're devestated to find that there are women out here just as serious as you are. The moment you relaize it, your woman is already being wooed by another woman, and you go from extraordinary to regular. All I can say is, be mindful and very careful what you aske for, you just might get it, and it may not be what you intended to have at all. It's like they say, what's good for the goose isn't always good for the gander. Just do you!

As Always,

Ms. Shu Shu

First allow me to re-introduce myself...

Larrieux-Chi-Chi Larrieux! Oh yeah, I know...her? Who her?!? That's my sister Shu-Shu. You may know us by many other names-Tee, Touk, Tiera, Toccara. All the names apply but from here on out I will be referred to as Ms. Chi-Chi and my dear sister will be referred to as Ms. Shu-Shu. It has been brought to our attention that we have quite a "following" if you will on FACEBOOK. To all of you that are actually inspired by us and think that our rantings (which most of the time is what my work is) are of the utmost signifant value, we thank you and would like you to know that this blog is just for you...

We appreciate every single one of you. Along with us there, will be several people that may collaborate with to bring you the GoSpEl TrUtH as only we know how! I would like to give a BIG shout out to "the unofficial enlightener"...my darling brooky. Please check her out @ absolutebrook.blogspot.com and yes that was a shameless plug! ツ ; my bestest Ms. La-La Fontaine also known as Myrna; the incomparable Ms. Vee; and all the other ladies that we have the opportunity to connect with. If there is any particular topic that anyone would like for us to bring to the forefront by all means LET US KNOW!!! This is an open forum as well as a blog. Some things are just things that we want to touch on and others may be suggestion from other. No topic is too small or too big for us to touch on. Anyone that knows us knows that we have an opinion about dayum near everything! We hope you all enjoy and if you don't...oh well! Can't please em all. That's what that "X" over there in the corner is for mmmkay?!? ~Ciao

Bewilderment

Pardon me but,

What is so odd about daring to be different? I'm sure everyone longs for a moment when they're living outside of their normal selves, or at least the selves that others have pegged them to be. I was brought up outside the box, so I never fit very well into it. Constant criticism about the way I dress and wear my hair became a regular part of my existence. So much so, that I cast it into oblivion with the rest of the banter that I found ridiculous. However, I do understand that there is no such thing as bad publicity, so I'll take it which ever way it comes. But anywho, I don't understand the motives of those who try desperately to pick others apart for their own amusement. Is is really that painful to see someone doing something out of the ordinary? Just think of how translucent this social order would be if some of the most amazing people to ever live would have decided to play it safe. Women would live in a constant state of emergency, without a sanitary method of relieving monthly hemorraging along with a long list of other female must haves. And how would men spend their past-times in the absence of Playstation and recreational sports? This life is all about reinvention and creativity, loving and supporting others of their quest to GREATNESS. What it is not about on the otherhand, is the allure of negavitiy surrounded by prejudice, ignorance, greed and envy. If you're so bent out of shape about others receiving all of the atention, find a way to turn a few heads yourself. Just a suggestion...

As Ever,

Ms. Shu Shu